Mr. Right by Elimination

Once upon a time, when I was still in the dating scene, this online friend of mine would go on a date, and I'd ask him, "How did it go?" And his answer would be, "She doesn't rock my world." So silly me, not questioning why this guy is qualified to be the spoke person of love, always thought that when I found Mr. Right, he'd rock my world. One and a half years of dating and five and a half years of marriage later, I've finally came to the revelation that Mr. (Mrs.) Right is found not by a process of picking and choosing, but a process of elimination.

Allow me to elaborate, when you first decide whether to go out with an individual, that's elimination because you have no way of knowing whether he or she is the right one for you, so you eliminate by looks, jobs, and other superficial factors. Then come the awkward first dates, more elimination, you spot for other major deal breakers that are noticeable right from the get go. If the individual made the cut, then comes the lengthy process of dating -- still an elimination process -- to see if there are any major incompatibilities or habits that absolutely cannot co-exist.

Lastly, after years of observation, and you decided that you can co-exist with this person, you enter into the committed relationship of marriage. Like my newly wedded friend said to me, "In the end, we all have our quirks, you look for the one that can best tolerate yours." And ladies and gentlemen, that is the truth of all relationships. So next time somebody comes up to me and asks me, "How do I know he (she) is the one?" My answer would be, "Well, if you don't find any of his habits intolerable, and he not overly critical of some of your habits, and the two of you can live in relative harmony, you have found the one."